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The Hottest Chicks of Lost

Monday, January 4th, 2010 | No Comments

LostMatthew Fox is kind of a tool, so I usually avoid watching Lost at all costs. But since it’s the final season of the show, I’m getting weepy. No, maybe I didn’t watch it, per se. But I always knew there were hot girls running around on an island. It was always there. It was a rock. Now it’s going to float away into the ether. And don’t tell me, when the final episode rolls around, that you enjoyed it. You didn’t. Friends? Prison Break? Seinfeld? Buffy? Yeah you definitely felt sad, alone and disappointed after those series finale. So let’s focus on hot chicks with goodies to avoid depression.

Evangeline Lilly – Kate Austen

Evangeline LillyEvangeline Lilly is hot enough without putting her, scantily clad, on and island for a few years. Especially near sex perv waiting-to-be Matthew Fox. And that big guy with the hair. Lost is pretty much her big break, aside from being in a million different small roles in Smallville. But you have to give her nerd cred for her roles.

Maggie Grace – Shannon Rutherford

Maggie GraceI love Maggie Grace. Not only because she has the sweet schoolgirl face, but also because she was in Taken this past year with Liam Neeson. Liam is the bomb. Maggie played some innocent “I’m going to travel to Europe and totally not get abducted and be forced into the human trafficking trade!” high school girl. Liam ended up killing a-holes and taking names, all to save sweet Maggie Grace. A+ in my movie review book.

Yunjim Kim – Sun Kwon

Yunjim KimOkay, first of all, her Lost name is ridiculous. Sun Kwon? Try a little harder to not be so stereotypical, Hollywood. Yes, she is Asian, but don’t give her a stupid name like that. Yunjim Kim (or Kim Yunjim to us Westerners) is not in nearly enough shows and films. I can’t enough of her! Hopefully after Lost she can dedicate herself to something really entertaining. Like fetish porn.

Hot Box Office Chicks I Love

Monday, December 28th, 2009 | No Comments

Hot Box Office Chicks

I thank God every day that I am best friends with Edgar the security guard at my local Cinemax; that way, when I get caught playing with myself I don’t get sent to jail. And since when is it fair for the sexual predator status to be permanent?

So what girls are in the recent box office hits that I want to bang? So glad you asked!

Michelle Rodriguez, Avatar

Michelle RodriguezAvatar is good enough without a supremely hot chick. I could get off to human/cat relations any day. But the fact that they added that droopy-eyed skank to the mix? Genius! Michelle is a mystery. In movies, she always plays a dyke-ish bitch who I hate the entire time. But in real life, she is such a funny sweetheart. I can most effectively express both my affection and hatred by giving her a facial.

Want to see more of Michelle?

Lake Bell, It’s Complicated

Lake Bell

You might think I’m disgusting for wanting to see It’s Complicated. I know that it’s a chick flick, but my idol Lake Bell is in it. And when I say idol I am being literal and describing the idol I made out of cum in Lake’s honor. She is hot, funny and a little bit scary. SHE is why I want to see It’s Complicated. … and I kind of wish Alec Baldwin was my dad.

See more of Lake here.

Rachel McAdams, Sherlock Holmes

Rachel McAdamsRachel McAdams is one of the hottest women at the movies today. I’ve had a soft spot in my heart for Rachel ever since I saw her in The Notebook… because I broke up with my emotional bitch of a girlfriend after seeing that stupid movie. So Rachel is a symbol of my sweet release. In more ways than one.

Rachel McAdams pics here!