Irina is the only woman on this Earth who could give me a painful boner just by standing in front of a conifer. I’m not sure why she dressed herself in a slutty-ass bikini only to launch herself at some Christmas greenery, but I obviously don’t care. If it didn’t somehow seem disturbing and wrong on many levels, I’d put a cut-out of Irina on my own Christmas tree and do stuff on Christmas morning as a present to myself.
Ohhhhh don’t worry. The kids will still be in bed. Probably.



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Here’s Irina Sheik showing off the Fall/Winter Collection for Italian clothing label, Intimissimi. The fact that these pictures are aimed at women and not prepubescent boys and perverts like me just doesn’t make any sense. But that’s okay because masturbating to a clothing catalog is something I’ve sworn off ever since my mom walked in on me with the JC Penney Spring 1998 edition. Since that awkward moment, our conversations have been limited to “do you have any extra stamps?” and “Did you wash my clothes yet? No? Well, fucking do it.”
But anyway, back to Irina. If your girlfriend/wife is the same size as Irina, which there’s no way she is since not many girls are 6′3″, 85 pounds, then you should probably buy her some of this lingerie or whatever the fuck it is for Christmas.




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