The beautiful Brooklyn Decker is 2010’s Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue Cover model; an American model graces the cover! I like Brooklyn Decker, she’s pretty but not over the top hot, giving us regular guys the illusion that we could actually score a chance with her. She’s not a dream killer and that’s gotta count for something. Although Brooklyn Decker looks great on the 2010 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit cover, in my opinion something was a little off about this year’s issue. It may be because trying to top Bar Refaeli’s perfect cover and equally flawless spreads from last year’s super sexy issue is just impossible but whatever the reason this year’s issue fell a little short for me, it was boring. How you make a collection of photographs featuring the most beautiful women in the world, practically half naked boring is just beyond me. Sports Illustrated needs to step up the Swimsuit Issue in 2011 and reimburse us for this year’s yawn issue! Here’s an idea, lose the swimsuits!
Brooklyn Decker lands the 2010 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue Cover
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Angelina Jolie Banged a Prehistoric Animal, Mick Jagger! Gross
So apparently Angelina Jolie is the female, white version of Tiger Woods she just does a hell of a better job hiding her slutty ways this may be because unlike Tiger, Angelina is smart enough NOT to have sexual relations with budget ass people, who’ll snitch at the drop of a tabloid offer. Anyways the Daily Mail reports on Angelina Jolie’s apparent trysts with various ‘famous’ dudes including the dinosaur, Mick Jagger, Colin Farrel and Ralph Fiennes were also identified as fuckin lucky bastards who got to bang Angelina Jolie. Here’s what went down according to the Daily Mail, I should also mention that these allegations were taken from a new tell-all book which also claims Angelina was cheating on Brad Pitt when they first met (tell all book…hum red flags?) :
“It is alleged the pair first had a brief fling after she starred in the video for the Rolling Stones’ 1997 song Anybody Seen My Baby?, while she was still married to British actor Jonny Lee Miller.
And it is claimed they enjoyed a second affair six years later in 2003, while the womanising rocker was with his latest lover L’Wren Scott. On this occasion it is claimed the two were seen going back to Jagger’s room at the Oriental hotel in Bangkok, Thailand.”
On Angelina Jolie already cheating when she first met and seduced at the time married Brad Pitt (who is looking more and more like an old hobo these days):
“Paul also claims that Angelina was sleeping with Hollywood star Ralph Fiennes and ex-husband Miller when she met Brad Pitt in 2004.
She also says that Jolie was dating Irish actor Colin Farrell, 33, for four months after meeting him on the set of 2004 film, Alexander.”
So there you have it, Angelina Jolie is an apparent slut, take that Megan Fox, the biggest Angelina Jolie wannabe has only been with two partners my ass!
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Lindsay Lohan Still Insane wants $100,000,000 over E Trade ad
Although Lindsay Lohan has been trying her very best (I use the word ‘best’ loosely, because think of what an addicts very best entails, not much and for Lindsay Lohan her very best is not doing a mountain of blow with a rolled up news paper during an interview) to convince the world that she’s a changed women, that she’s no longer a junkie, drama queen, spoiled ginger drunken retard, derailed train wreck. However, Lindsay Lohan’s latest move reaffirms that Lindsay Lohan is still as fuckin stupid as ever and probably really really desperate for drug money. Lindsay Lohan is suing E Trade Securities for 100 million dollars over their commercial featuring a “milk-a-holic” named Lindsay (the commercial is hilarious).
This from Lindsay Lohan’s lawyer:
Lohan’s lawyer, Stephanie Ovadia, said the actress has the same single-name recognition as Oprah or Madonna.
“Many celebrities are known by one name only, and E-Trade is using that knowledge to profit,” Ovadia said.
“They used the name Lindsay … This is a subliminal message. Everybody’s talking about it and saying it’s Lindsay Lohan.”
She says Lohan is owed $50 million in exemplary damages, plus another $50 million in compensatory damages.
WOW! First question, how is Lindsay Lohan going to pay her lawyer? Second question Lindsay Lohan did you get even more fuckin retarded? Did someone lace your supply of blow with retard dust? Lindsay Lohan should thank E Trade Securities for using a name that is the same as hers on TV, when was the last time that Lindsay Lohan’s name was used in conjunction with something positive like milk, babies and the diversification of portfolios? Also implying that the only substance Lindsay Lohan is addicted to is milk has probably been the most flattering things that anyone has said about her in years. Last, Lindsay Lohan comparing her name to the likes of Oprah and Madonna is just plain insanity, because last time I checked the name Lindsay is a generic, ugly ass name that millions of stupid people name their kids. So Lindsay Lohan get over youself, you’re stupid please move to Germany and live with David Hasselhoff, I’m sure you two will have a wonderful time eating burgers off the floor. Props to e-trade for the lindsay lohan commercial.
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Screw the iPad and give me some of that Abigail Clancy
You can always leave it to the Italians to do things that don’t make sense (those idiots from the Jersey Shore are indisputable proof) like putting the incredibly beautiful Abigail Clancy on the cover of an issue of Italian technology that is trying to promote that really big iphone also known as the iPad. In my opinion the iPad is just apple’s way of whoring out a phone that only the infantile minded use, all the smart cool people use blackberry’s. The iPad is just stupid because why the fuck would anyone wanna carry around a giant iphone? You can’t even put that thing in your pocket, which means you have to lug it around all day like the nerd that you are. My point in this whole thing is that even though those I-talians are using uber hot Abigail Clancy to promote the ipad, ya a half naked Abigail Clancy won’t take attention off a dumb ass piece of technology, I’m not complaining because god damn do I ever love looking at Abigail Clancy and fortunately for me (and all of you) Italian technology decided to not make sense and provide pages and pages of Abigail Clancy in her underwear to promote the ipad.
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Kourtney Kardashian has kid with a STD
Even though I think all those Kardashian sisters are useless, famous for nothing, unattractive idiots, this story is just too hilarious not to post. So apparently according to In Touch Weekly (hence the apparently) Kourtney Kardashian, the eldest Kardashian sister, who just had a baby with a non professional black athlete, Scott Disick, douche master was nicknamed ‘STD’ and ‘Number one Scum’ in high school. STD for those of you who don’t know and I can’t imagine who wouldn’t know, stands for sexually transmitted disease. In Touch Weekly who’s source for this story was a dude by the name of Jason Green reports:
Long before he gained fame on Keeping Up With the Kardashians, Scott was known as a hard partier, a serial cheater and, as one high school acquaintance puts it, “a tool.” And as more and more information surfaces about Scott’s shady past, Kourtney wonders how long she’ll be able to put up with him. Jason Green, one of Scott’s former classmates from Long Island, N.Y.’s Ross School, agrees that Scott was bad news in high school. “There were just as many rumors about him then as there are now,” Jason tells In Touch. “Scott had a couple of nicknames in high school. One was Number One Scum, and the other was STD.”
A lot of guys might be embarrassed to have the initials “STD,” but Scott thought they enhanced his reputation as a ladies’ man! According to Jason, Scott was so proud to have the same initials as “sexually transmitted disease” that “he wore dog tags with ‘STD’ printed on them.”
Holy Fuckin hell, am I right or am I right? Kourtney Kardashian proves that stupidity is a dominant Kardashian trait, as if we didn’t already know that Kardashian were stupid when we saw Kim Kardashian on tape allowing that turd Ray-J to…well you know. But back to Kourtney, who not only got knocked up by Mr. ‘STD’ Scott Disick who just oozes doucheness, but the fact that she got knocked up by him means that she’s now Mrs. STD. Oh that and the fact that she decided to procreative with this dude is just…wow! Kourtney Kardashian, smartest person alive!
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Damn Megan Fox is not Slutty
In the latest issue of Harper’s Bazaar the super sexy Megan Fox reveals that she’s only had sex with two men in her entire life…I call bullshit or stupid because that’s really such a waste! One of them being the B.A.G man (Brian Austin Green). Megan Fox elaborates on this preposterous claim and saids:
“I’ve only been with two men my entire life. My childhood sweetheart and Brian. I can never have sex with someone that I don’t love, ever. The idea makes me sick. I’ve never even come close to having a one-night stand.”
With those words being said you know that dudes are now just hell bent on socking B.A.G right in the face, take that Brian Austin Green , what the fuck you gonna do now that terminator the Sarah Connor Chronicles is cancelled and you don’t have any robot friends or friends for that matter to save you? Ya, I’m just being a hater because no matter how you slice it or how many times you punch B.A.G in his mug, he’s still got it better than any man on this planet, no job, sugar momma who is Megan fox and exclusive rights to sexy time starring Megan Fox anytime he wants.
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Lara Bingle nude shower picture scandal

Yes, Yes I know the first question you probably have is who the fuck is Lara Bingle? To that I answer, Lara Bingle is a hot Australian supermodel model who is currently kind of a big deal in the land down under partly because of her nude shower picture scandal, the other part is because well look at her pure hotness. Lara Bingle embodies two things that I most love to write about, hot models and their naked pictures. Turns out the Lara Bingle is currently suing her ex-boyfriend, an Australian football player for the Brisbane Lions, Brendan Fevola for allegedly distributing a nude shower photo of Bingle from back when they were a couple in 2006. Of course I’m not going to post that infamous, center of a legal issue nude photo of Lara Bingle, however there are legitimate topless photos of Lara Bingle from a German GQ shoot so you guys can look at those instead and run with it. I think that Lara Bingle’s hotness has made me curious about what other gems Australia has to offer, I’m going to be on the lookout down under for some more sizzling half naked models.
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The 2010 Oscars was Beyond Shitty

The 2010 academy awards were just above and beyond shitty this year but what could I really expect from an event that revolves around handing out awards to a bunch of pretentious Hollywood people who’s paid grade for five minutes of ‘work’ is more, waaaay more then you make in five years. I must be semi-retarded because every year I watch this stupid award show and then ask myself why the fuck I just wasted a couple hours that I’ll never get back watching this shit, but every year I go back and watch the same shit award show; it’s a vicious retard cycle. I think deep down I’m hoping that something really exciting might happen, like a Sandra Bullock nip slip or Kate Winslet’s dress accidently slipping off during her acceptance speech. It’s like buying the lottery, you do it, not expecting to win but you don’t want your numbers to get called the one time you don’t buy that ticket. Anyways my numbers didn’t get called this year because the Oscars were like usual, boring as hell and even extra shittier than usual this year. To make things worse, all the women on the red carpet wore ugly ass dresses that didn’t show any tit or ass. The Oscars are a lost cause, but for all of you who were smart enough not to watch, I would like to reward you with photos of cleavage shots, or lack thereof from Oscar night. Here are Oscars babes, enjoy!
Women of the 2010 academy awards
Kelly Brook
Miley Cyrus
Maria Menounos
Vanessa Hudgens
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Natalie Portman ( the jewish godess)
Elizabeth Banks
Carey Mulligan
Diane Kruger
Anna Kendrick
Hilary Swank
Christina Hendricks
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Lindsay Lohan Strips down for Purple Magazine, Tit and Ass shots!
Lindsay Lohan is trying her absolute best and pulling out all the stops, well pulling out her tits and ass as for a recent Purple magazine photoshoot to try and appeal to men again, try being the operative word here. Lindsay Lohan in a photoshoot for purple magazine shot by Terry Richardson (the dude who got to shoot a bunch of models, including a topless Miranda Kerr for the Pirelli Calendar). WOW Pirelli must be run by a bunch of geniuses, because hands down the smartest way to sell tires is to give out calendars of topless models, I’d purposely drive over nails so I’d have to buy new Pirelli tires and get a copy of that holy grail of a calendar. Anyways back to Lindsay Lohan and her Purple magazine shoot, so she stripped down to her best underwear, showed a little tit and ass but at the end of the day Lindsay Lohan is still a train wreck of a women no amount of photoshopped tit and ass flash can make me forget that she’s a stung out freckle infested ginger. Come on Lindsay Lohan you gotta do better then giving us photos of Lindsay Lohan boobs and butt.
more pics after the break
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Marisa Miller Hot in VEGAS
If anyone thought Marisa Miller couldn’t get any hotter you thought wrong, because Marisa Miller reached a whole new level of hot in a recent photoshoot for VEGAS magazine. Although we’re probably all use to seeing Marisa Miller with very little clothing, she can rock out pretty sexy even when she’s covered up, as she is in her new shoot for VEGAS magazine. Marisa Miller pulls off her best seductress poses for the shoot, and god damn seduced us she does. Honestly Marisa Miller has got to be one of the sexiest women ever created, it is next to impossible for this women to ever look anything less then uber ridiculous hot, put her in an old garbage bag and she’ll still look a zillion times better than your girlfriend on her best day. If you couldn’t already tell, I fuckin love Marisa Miller, and don’t pretend that you don’t either.
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