2010 March | MeandIsis

Archive for March, 2010

Heidi Montag is an Annoying Idiot

Saturday, March 27th, 2010 | No Comments

I really didn’t want to give Heidi ‘Horseface’ Montag any undue attention, because frankly she’s a sleezy, annoying individual who would probably retreat to a cave somewhere if she was banned from being stupid and staging those fake photo-ops. However, I wanted to post these recent photos of Heidi Montag, looking like the most ridiculous human I’ve ever seen, as a public warning to girls who are thinking of getting greedy with their boob jobs; don’t do it! Honestly Heidi Montag’s new boobs are the essence of ‘bolt on’ tits and are probably as hard as the crust on a Domino’s pizza, it’s disgusting. I bet the only people on this planet who think Horseface’s new tits are great is that equally disgusting ‘husband’/pimp of hers, Spencer Pratt and truck drivers. Don’t get me wrong I think fake tits are awesome, if they are done tastefully; but when you get a couple bolt on boulders that look like there impeding on your respiratory system that’s just wrong. Don’t even get me started on Heidi Montag’s face and horse hair.

TAGS: Heidi Montag

Paris Hilton haz boobs

Wednesday, March 24th, 2010 | 1 Comment

Paris Hilton is like a fat bitch in a miniskirt, I just don’t get it. I don’t get how Paris Hilton has managed to stay ‘famous’ for as long as she has. I don’t get why she’s with a guy, Doug Reinhardt who is unemployed and a renter. But what really baffles me about Paris Hilton is how she’s sometimes as flat as the stock market on a Friday afternoon but other times she’s got huge knockers. Take these recent Paris Hilton photos for example, she actually has some decent cleavage going, is there some kind of magical heiress push up (wayyyy up) bra that poor girls don’t know about? Because if such a bra exists it would save a lot of girls the trouble and extra interest accumulated from the boob jobs that they are desperate enough to finance. It would also save some serious coin for all the dumb suckers who buy chicks tits. So Paris Hilton maybe you can do one good deed in your life and let all the flat chicks out there know your cleavage trick. It would be utterly cruel not to share.

TAGS: Paris Hilton

Alessandra Ambrosio, Yup Still Hot

Wednesday, March 24th, 2010 | 1 Comment

Some women need to bring sexy back, but for Alessandra Ambrosio sexy never left and if she can still be sexy after having a baby then chances are Alessandra Ambrosio will be forever sexy, thank you god. Alessandra Ambrosio somehow manages to look hot, sexy, beautiful, and gorgeous in every single photo even when she’s fully clothed, and her new shoot with Elle France is no exception. Yes I know what you’re probably thinking, Elle France is way too conservative to feature a topless, showing her ass, showing some nipple, wearing see through tops Alessandra Ambrosio, and though Elle Magazine sucks for not giving us what we really want at least those pretentious, cheese eating French folk were nice enough to feature a foreigner as sexy as Alessandra Ambrosio in their magazine. Alessandra Ambrosio still looks smokin in Elle wait a minute, hold up there ARE photos of her in a see through top, showing some nip! Isn’t it awesome when you think that something good isn’t gonna happen but then it unexpectedly happens? You just got that good tingly feeling didn’t you?

TAGS: Alessandra Ambrosio

Alice Eve in Maxim

Wednesday, March 24th, 2010 | 1 Comment

Alice Eve, star of ‘She’s Out Of My League’ and actually out of pretty much every guys league shows off her huge boobs in the new issue of Maxim. Alice Eve is an extremely rare breed of female, because not only is she hot as fuck but apparently she’s also smart, so therefore Alice Eve is one of about 17 hot and smart females that exists on this planet (must be nice to win the genetic lottery). Before, baring almost all for Maxim and becoming an American sex symbol Alice Eve, unlike most mildly to severely retarded chicks whose sole life plan revolves around the exploitation of their looks was smart enough to invest in her education; and Alice Eve actually has an impressive education, she went to the highly acclaimed University of Oxford. I’ve heard rumors of sexy women with brains but until now I dismissed them as urban legends. Honestly, it’s great if you’re hot enough to get guys to think dirty thoughts about you, but at the end of the day you’ll just be another piece of hot ass. So if your ever lucky enough to come across a smart and sexy women like Alice Eve and somehow trick her into thinking that you’re worthy of her time, you better do whatever the fuck it takes to keep her around, because what better way to punk the universe and all your lowly friends then to be able to say I have a limited edition, one of 17 sexy smart chicks in existence! By the way obtaining a degree from beauty school, community college and/or trade school does not constitute as an ‘achievement’ (I’m using ‘achievement’ in a sarcastic way) that would render one as smart, nice try though.

TAGS: alice eve

Heidi Klum Topless Pictures

Tuesday, March 23rd, 2010 | No Comments

Sure Heidi Klum has popped out a couple kids and is married to some dude who named himself after a marine mammal but god damn Heidi Klum still does tits like its nobody business. Heidi Klum is a true Supermodel, because not only does she have Super fantastic tits but even after all these years she still loves to get naked for the camera, what a champ! Heidi Klum’s still got it, because judging by these topless photos from the April issue of Allure magazine, Heidi Klum can still Supermodel the shit out of all those other Supermodels, does she look sexy as hell or does she look sexy as hell? God that husband of hers, Seal or Dolphin or whatever the fuckers name is, is one lucky bastard, imagine getting to play with Heidi Klum’s tits anytime you want! He has access to her boobs the same way most dudes have access to an Xbox all day everyday baby. Anyways here are some photos of Heidi Klums tits covered in whipped cream and doing other stuff, enjoy, I know I did.

TAGS: Heidi Klum

Audrina Patridge’s Boobs Can’t Contain Themselves

Tuesday, March 23rd, 2010 | No Comments

It’s no big secret that I love Audrina Patridge’s boobs and the only thing better then Audrina Patridge’s boobs is Audrina Patridge’s boobs trying to escape from her top! I (and all of you) got a treat today because Audrina Patridge’s big fake boobs tried to make a break for it while she was getting her nails did, nice. I can see why her titties would wanna break free, well besides the fact that they want me to see them, it seems so unnatural to confine such big beautiful creatures into such a small tight spot. Come on Audrina Patridge free those babies, oppression is so 1940’s plus you paid good money for them, show them off (without your top) and get your money’s worth. Audrina Patridge when in doubt don’t be a bore be a whore and I’m not saying that showing us your tits is would make you a whore but it’s a step in the right direction.

TAGS: Audrina Patridge

Megan Fox’s Ass Not Published?

Monday, March 22nd, 2010 | No Comments

Megan ‘I’ve only been with two guys’ Fox recently had a very sexy photo shoot with Harper’s Bazaar. I thought the photos that Harper’s Bazaar published were pretty sexy but imagine my shock and awe when I found out that there are outtakes from the shoot of Megan Fox on a bed with her ass up in the air, and yes I’ve provided those photos for you to drool over and think dirty thoughts about (come on just stating the obvious truth). My question of the day is what the fuck is wrong with Harper’s Bazaar magazine? Do they not want to sell a bazillion magazines? Apparently not! Because let me tell you publishing photos of Megan Fox in compromising positions and as close to naked as Megan Fox is going to get for a mainstream magazine shoot will sell way more magazines then photos of Megan Fox fully clothed in boring ass fancy dresses that cover the majority of her body! Seriously Harper’s Bazaar magazine, get your shit together! The paying public want Megan Fox, face down ass up…please and thank you.

TAGS: Megan Fox

Sophia Bush Bikini Photos

Monday, March 22nd, 2010 | No Comments

Sophia Bush, who is on that even more annoying then Gossip Girl show, One Tree Hill is pretty cute, so I thought why not brighten up some dude’s day and put up some photos of Sophia Bush in a bikini. These bikini photos of Sophia Bush were taken on the set of One Tree Hill (sometime last summer), One Tree Hill for the record is a show that needs to finally for the love of god get cancelled. But who cares if these photos are from last summer because bikini photos of hot babes is like football, always a pleasure to watch. Actually, after looking at these photos of Sophia Bush in a bikini, I’m starting to get some clarity on why the network keeps One Tree Hill around. It’s because the producers and probably every other dude who works on the show want to get Sophia Bush into another bikini, but this time a smaller one, and she should be required to step into a really really strong wave. Ya I doubt anyone’s still reading this post, so on to the next…

TAGS: Sophia Bush

Alessandra Ambrosio Bending Over in Tiny Pink Bikini, Life is Great!

Monday, March 22nd, 2010 | No Comments

Having a bad day? Thinking to yourself, god damn my life is fuckin shit? House, car, pets or all the above getting repo’d? Wish that your girlfriend or wife wasn’t such a donkey? Well I have something that can take your mind off your incredibly crappy life, photos of the jaw dropping Alessandra Ambrosio in a tiny pink bikini and bending over! Yes, Alessandra Ambrosio along with her fantastic rack and ass are here to save the day! And she’s doing in a sizzling hot bikini! All the world’s problems have just been put on hold, because every man who lays eyes on these Alessandra Ambrosio bikini pics will need to take a peaceful moment to himself and after that moment all these men will feel a sense of content, happiness, peace. All the hostility, anger and resentment that fellow man may feel toward one another and toward our female counterparts will halt to the specimen of perfection that is Alessandra Ambrosio. Honestly, if these photos can’t make your day then it’s probably time to give up. Alessandra Ambrosio, thank you for all the community service that you and your half naked body have done!

TAGS: Alessandra Ambrosio

Jesse Vanilla Gorilla James is Sorry/Fucked, Sandra Bullock Moves Out

Sunday, March 21st, 2010 | No Comments

Yesterday news broke that Jesse James cheated on his wife Sandra Bullock with one very interesting looking whore. However, Sandra Bullock must have obviously known that her husband was cheating on her before the story broke because she moved out of the home that her and Jesse share on Monday. People magazine reports:

The actress left the Southern California house she shares with James just days before a report of infidelity by her husband surfaced, a source tells PEOPLE.

If we had any doubts about claims of James’ infidelity he cleared all that up today by issuing an apology (or what most definitely resembles an apology) to People Magazine and pretty much admitting that he is in fact a Vanilla Gorilla who repeated fucked a graffiti ditch pig. More from People:

“The vast majority of the allegations reported are untrue and unfounded. Beyond that, I will not dignify these private matters with any further public comment.
“There is only one person to blame for this whole situation, and that is me. It’s because of my poor judgment that I deserve everything bad that is coming my way.
“This has caused my wife and kids pain and embarrassment beyond comprehension and I am extremely saddened to have brought this on them. I am truly very sorry for the grief I have caused them. I hope one day they can find it in their hearts to forgive me.”

Jesse James is a fuckin retard because not only did he cheat on his wife who according to Forbes is worth 85 million dollars, do the math how many choppers do you have to build to make half of 85 million? Answer: way more then you can handle buddy but he cheated on her with the epitome of white trash (who in their right mind gets a huge tattoo across their forehead? Shit!). Sandra Bullock is one smart lady for getting the fuck out of that house, because not only did Jesse retarded James Tiger Woods her ass but he didn’t even have the decency to cheat with someone who resembles a human being.

TAGS: jesse james, Sandra Bullock

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