I can’t put together what’s going on and why Salma Hayek is wearing a Bavarian Dirdnl to a German show but why question the facts, the fact that her breasts are enormously delicious. Makes you want to say “Screw it, I’m gonna suck ‘em even though they are probably full of milk”. As gross as that statement may seem, you know you want to try to fit that giant boob in your mouth. Don’t lie.
German Olympic Swimmer Franziska Van Almsick is probably one of the few hot chicks from the swim team. She won her first medal in 1992 Barcelona when she was just 14 but none of that stuff turns me on. What turns me on is that she’s German. I love German babes. More importantly, she looks great in a bikini.
As you know Fashion week in Paris has been going on for days now but take a good look at these models for Alexander McQueens Spring/Summer 2009 collection. They look miserable. I’ll tell you why folks, not only are those poor chicks wearing hideous outfits but they are wearing stalkings over their head. Yes, stalkings. This isn’t fashion, it’s called a fetish.
Although I’d have to admit watching these unhappy hot models walk the catwalk with stalkings over their head in ridiculously short dresses is kinda sexy. Especially the ones with the corset and crazy skin tight black dress. I guess I’m a bit of a weirdo.
Everybody is flipping out that Angelina Jolie detached herself from the milking machine of her dungeon of babies and made it to the premiere of her new movie Changeling with her “partner” Brad Pitt. He’s more like a worker ant providing his queen with sperm to produce a good looking army for the end of times in 2025. True Story.
Oh you see that gibberish tattoo on her arm, well those are the coordinates of where the war of the beautifuls will occur. Just kidding, it’s actually the coordinates of where her kids were born. Now that’s a fact. Probably the only fact in this post.
Marketing geniuses at work… chicks bouncing on pogo sticks in bikini’s now buy my titties-er, I mean insurance.
Hello, this is Madeline Zima from the Showtime series Californication, she has big naturals. I don’t watch that show, I don’t even have Showtime but this a great reason to talk my husband into added the channel. I mean, she doesn’t seem like a shy chick being you can clearly see she loves her boobs. She wants you to love her boobs and that an excellent reason to tune in. I’m on the phone with Comcast as we speak.. type..
It’s kinda sad when you get to the point that you stop trying to keep your titties covered anymore. Jodie Marsh just said “F*ck it” they’re gonna come out anyway, why bother restraining them. If you look closely you can totally see her nipples. Not saying much from a woman with a tattoo of Michael Jackson’s face on her arm and many more prison-like tattoos she probably already regrets.
Angelina Jolie finally comes out to show us what a cyborg looks like after giving birth to twin babies and spawning about 10 others. She’s like a Maguay that shouldn’t be fed after midnight or she’ll start reproducing left and right.
Brad Pitt needs to put a deadbolt on the fridge and the pool covered. Regardless, the bitch is a robot or something, after all those kids she still looks prefect. That shit ain’t human.
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